6. Sauntering into Retirement - 1974

Our first daughter, Devon, arrived in the Spring of 1974. By now our house was quite well along although far from finished. Still just the tiny bathroom in the new addition but a fabulous kitchen with a Garland restaurant stove and butcher block counters and a lovely dining room with wainscoting. Our bedroom was now in the main house but accessed through an unheated hall with an adjacent 2nd bedroom for the baby. I can’t remember exactly the order of things only that every spare moment and dollar went into that house.

By Christmas of 1975 the living room and 3 bedrooms were complete and the upstairs bathroom was roughed in and useable. We were looking forward to having the in-laws for a celebration of Christmas Eve and an overnight. We had no idea of the disaster that was looming.

Frits’ mother and stepfather owned a 165 acre farm in Randolph, Vermont, some 60 miles to our south. During his teenage years Frits spent his summers haying, milking, and tending other livestock alongside his parents. It was not an easy life with Mogens who had no children of his own and never developed any parenting skills. He and Grethe, both from Denmark had married when Frits was seven, fortunately after he had spent some of his most formative years with just his loving mother.

As Christmas approached Frits’s mother warned that Mogens early dementia was getting difficult to handle. We, I regret to say, had not been paying enough attention. Devon, at 18 months was just beginning to know about presents and as we decorated, trimmed the tree and prepared a traditional Danish meal, the excitement was building, only to be dashed soon after their arrival. Within minutes an argument ensued over the arrangement of our furniture. Mogens was confused about where he was and so nothing was in the ‘right’ place.

From that point on the Christmas Eve we had planned was lost, Devon and I were in tears, Frits was angry and fearful for our safety and poor Grethe had to drive home the next morning with a man she no longer knew.

After a brief period of hospitalization, Mogens died quietly the following Spring. 

After that disastrous beginning,Christmas Eve celebrations have become a wonderful tradition in our household. Sometimes quite small but as our family grows and more friends and their families join us, we have expanded to close to twenty. I wonder what it will be like in the year of COVID-19.

5. Sauntering into Retirement -2018

December 2017 marked the official end of my working for profit life. I was still struggling with chronic pain in my head and neck and it was time to find a solution or at least a way to live with it. Trips to the Mayo Clinic in Minnesota and many diagnostic tests here in Vermont and Boston had not turned up any specific cause other than nerve damage. Reducing my stress level, making time for exercise, yoga, massage, a good nutritional diet and rest seemed like the place to start.

A daily morning walk with the dogs on our trails has been a habit begun at least 20 years ago. Summer and winter, rain, snow or sunshine we are out there, sometimes before full light.  Thirty minutes of brisk up and down walking and talking, sharing thoughts and ideas, ranting about our current administration, and enjoying nature and time with each other and our dogs is good for the body and soul. Today I walk twice a day. Even better.

Eating healthy has always been a priority, well except for the copious amount of ice cream Frits and I partake in. Now I would have more time for preparing meals at home and raising vegetables.  I’ve always enjoyed baking and now could make all my own bread, with the help of a bread maker, muffins, scones, pies and crumbles and of course, ice cream. Neither Frits nor I, eat large quantities of anything, well except ice cream, so we are able to maintain our weight easily.

Once the holidays were over and winter had set in we settled into a mostly stay-at-home lifestyle that included time with friends and family but still I had time on my hands. Keeping my hands occupied it seemed, was going to be important. There was a time, back in the 80s, when I developed a small business making lamps with stenciled shades and applying stencils to T shirts, sweatshirts and the like. It was moderately successful.

One day, while surfing the internet I came upon needle felting. A woman in Russia made the most incredible birds and animals from wool and wire. I had to know how to do this! With the help of YouTube I created my first, very basic owl.

Not much talent needed here. As time went by my technique improved as I created many small birds and owls, some not too life-like but marginally good enough that I could give them away to friends and family. Soon I was over run with critters, not just birds but squirrels, chipmunks, foxes and other woodland creatures.

A friend and local gallery owner approached me about consigning some pieces. My intent was not to make a viable business and put pressure on myself but rather to keep my hands busy. However now I had a reason to keep stabbing that wool. My arthritic thumbs were not too happy but if I paced myself they held up.

I have added giraffes, cheetahs, elephants and many dogs to my collection, including some specific pets, copied from photos, as long lasting memories for their owners.

 

Of late, I’m into cats!! 

Some very talented Russian women still have me beat but, you know, retirement could go on for a very long time!

4 - Sauntering into Retirement - 2001

A chance comment at a drinks party in 2001 when a brief unhappy time of employment needed to end, changed the course of the next 15 years.  An offer to join Pall Spera Company, a highly respected Stowe real estate office, intrigued me although not enough at first, to send me running to long-discarded licensing books. I had had a brief dalliance with real estate sales back in the early 80’s when the children were young and my time was not my own. After only a few months I warehoused my license with the state and moved on. Little did I know how useful this would be in the future.

Had it not been for the truly impossible situation in my current job, no details here, I may not have considered the offer.  However after researching my options, I was relieved to discovered that my license could be reinstated all these years later with just a few hours of continuing ed. Today this is not the case as regulations have tightened. 

So armed with a license and very little knowledge I embarked on the 4th and final career of my life. 

Expecting a somewhat more laid back life it quickly became apparent this was not to be.  The learning curve is quite steep in the beginning and, in fact, leveled off very little over the years. Staying slightly ahead of one’s competitors meant being tech savvy and pushing ahead with new ideas and products that would appeal to the customer. Working side by side with a colleague drove us both to develop an innovative style that would put us in the forefront of our company in sales.

As good as that felt, it was exhausting. My days were long and even taking some time away from the office did not mean I was free from the constant pressure. Yes, I could have turned off my phone, my computer, my IPad but I enjoyed what I did and my competitive spirit did not allow for less than the best I could provide. 

I realize now, in retirement, that I have been driven my whole life to try to be the best even when my natural abilities didn’t allow. That’s a lot of pressure to put on oneself. I have no regrets but maybe I could have been a little easier on myself.

2. Sauntering into Retirement - 1969 - 1971

My first career involved horses, everything from raising them, competing with them and teaching others to ride. Ski instructing overlapped as my second career and for more than 20 years I struggled with cold hands and feet while loving the sport itself.    Frits was a builder and together, early in our relationship, we tore apart an old tenement house that we purchased for $5,000 on 3 acres of land with a beautiful brook running right behind the house. How fortunate we felt even knowing how much work was ahead. It was not habitable, although Frits had holed up there the year before using water from the brook and an old toilet in the shed that he could flush with a bucket. Who knew where that went! 

We still had a place to stay for the winter but by the spring of 1971, with money tight, we needed to be living on the land. That winter an old school bus caught our eye and for very little money, we purchased it and drove it to the new ‘house’. 

Parked out front it sat for one of the snowiest winters in years. 

Mid April, we packed up our few belongings, two cats and a large malamute dog and headed to Sterling Valley. The snow was still so deep that we could walk through the rear exit door of the bus without stepping up.  We had already stripped out all the seats so now all that was needed was a little furniture, a place to cook and power.  Power could be run from the house via a cable without problem.  The double bed still in the house, conveniently fit exactly cross ways at the rear end. A threadbare oriental carpet covered most of the metal floor and an old table and a couple of chairs served as kitchen counter, dining, work space etc.  

We had a two burner hot plate, an electric frying pan and a few dishes. We were set! It was still cold enough that a fridge was unnecessary and our bucket of water froze regularly at night. We needed that big furry malamute and two cats in bed with us to stay warm.

Without the convenience of cell phones, a land line was a must, and to our surprise the telephone company agreed to install a wall phone right in the bus. Our friends joked about this for years.

With five months until our wedding, the push was on to make at least part of the house habitable by the time we returned from our travels in mid October. The house foundation consisted of loose rocks haphazardly stacked to support some of the rotting sills. To get at this we would need to excavate a large enough hole so why not build a new section while we were at it.  The addition, only 12x16ft with 2 stories would provide a living area, temporary kitchen and bathroom, and a bedroom above. We would be able to insulate and heat this small area enough so we could move out of the bus and have a solid roof over our heads to survive the winter. And survive we did, just!

By the time we left for our English wedding I was fit and tanned and 15 pounds lighter. All those concrete blocks to carry, wheelbarrows of liquid concrete to push and lumber to hoist necessitated some wedding dress alterations but left me in the best shape of my life, never to return to my pudgy, former state.

We had barely a penny to our names but were happy and healthy, and very certain our marriage could survive whatever was ahead. Our mutual love of animals and Frits fascination with nature would keep us in Vermont and provide us with many common interests, and chores to share over the years.

1. Sauntering into Retirement - 2020

Retirement was always out there but nothing I really expected to embrace. Working in Real Estate, I thought, would allow me to slow down when the time came and be able to work at my own speed.  Being successful as a Realtor means answering every call, email and text within an hour regardless of time of day or night. It also means being on the run, showing properties, helping clients through building inspections, closings and even packing and making dump runs at the eleventh hour. Not being available to your customers and clients means they go elsewhere very quickly! 

Some health issues forced me to consider full retirement. I resisted for a couple of years but reluctantly pulled down my shingle at the close of 2017. I was 71 and ready to saunter.

Now at 73, I’m embracing retirement and happily sauntering. 

Since arriving in the US from England at the age of 19 I have galloped through life working several different careers, raising children and being very happily married to a wonderful man. We met in 1969 and married in 1971. That means next year we will celebrate 50 married years. It is impossible to imagine just how fast those years go by. At times it was overwhelming keeping our heads above water as we paddled frantically to build not one but three homes, keep the children fed and clothed and still keep up with the bills. But more about that in my next blog.

3 - Sauntering into Retirement - July 2020

In the midst of the Covid- 19 pandemic our lives are not so different. We walk daily with our dogs, tend both the vegetable and flower gardens, and while 1 have developed some new hobbies Frits has plenty to take care of maintaining our Waterbury Center property as well as some rental property in a neighboring town.

Normally we might be venturing out in our motor home either to visit family in the West or to take our grandsons on a trip. We miss these times when we can hug the grand kids and their parents but continue to be vigilant in our social distancing.  The West Coast grand daughters, Lake and Willa, although only 5 and 3 are quite adept at chatting via FaceTime, showing us their drawings and paintings and describing the scenes they have created. 

The grandsons, Jack and Tucker, 10 and 8 spend time with us at our pond where they amuse themselves for hours on their molded kayaks. These kayaks are absolutely the best! They weigh almost nothing and can be maneuvered easily by children and small adults. When first the family relocated to Stowe three years ago a friend clued us into these kayaks. We bought one and immediately bought the second and clad in life jackets these small boys have been entertained safely while we watch from the beach or join them in the row boat.

Dogs are a big part of our lives and 2019 brought a new and wonderful addition. Tweed the BorderTerrier was born. More about him coming later.